Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Should I blog or not?

Oh, hello blog. Remember me? I created you, I nurtured you, I grew you into a thing of beauty….

Oh, wait. I guess none of that actually happened. In my mind it might have happened. I love to write, but the things that I really want to write (oh, the stories I could tell)…well, someone might read them. And, I might piss someone off. It could make my life complicated; as if it’s not complicated enough already.

There might be another reason why I’m reluctant to write. I recently re-read my old diaries. I’ve been keeping diaries for as long as I have been able to spell (or misspell, whatever the case may be). And the truth is; I embarrass myself. Sometimes I feel like such a fool for things that I have written, even if it was meant for my eyes only. I actually wrote in my diary when I was 15 years old that I hoped someday my daughters could read what wrote, so they would know that I could relate to them. Are you kidding me, 15 year old self??? I read the things that you did when you were 15. I don’t think it’s necessary to give your daughters any ideas. What could I have possibly been thinking? NOTHING! That’s right, NOTHING!! I obviously had not grown a fully functioning brain by that point in my life, so there is no reason to go doling out advice from one non functioning brain to another. But, I digress…my point is, that if I blog about something, and post it on the internet, there is a very high probability that a few days down the road, my more evolved, highly functioning brain is going to say “Damn, I wish I hadn’t said that.”

But, then again, I do only have two followers on this blog. Stay tuned. You just never know.


Amy said...

On the other hand, it's fun to go back and read something that makes you go, "Oh I'm so glad I wrote that when I did!" Being vulnerable and open is hard to do, but it helps other people know the real you...especially when we can't be there in person. authentic about who you are and if somebody doesn't like's their problem!!! ;)

Jennifer said...

You are right, Amy, there are times when I am happy to look back at things I've written. I guess I just need to give in a little and put myself out there a little more.